In My Weakness…

He is strong.

It’s all I know right now.

It’s all I can depend on.

As life moves and days flow by, I am more aware every moment of my need to utterly depend on God.

Strong statement you say?  Perhaps…but what other things do I depend on without a thought?

Breathing? Food? Water?

Who gives them to me?

Who gave me the very breath I breathe?

He did.

Psalm 3:5, 6 says: ”Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.”

Cool.

Hmm…

Trust.

Lean not to my own understanding.

Acknowledge Him in all things.

He’ll work it out.

Got it.

Til the next time I worry, fret, fail or fall.

And he gently reminds me….

“My grace is sufficient, my daughter, and My power works best in weakness.”  (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Huh?

Best in weakness.  Doesnt that just BLOW your mind?  When my body hurts and Im feeling like I got hit by a truck, the last thing I want to do is pick up, carry, and do ANYTHING…Im certainly feeling WEAK and without STRENGTH and He says that’s when His power works BEST?

Not to carry my heavy box but to carry my heavy heart.

Oh yeah…that.

*smile*  Oh Friends…its all He is about.  Loving his kids enough to carry their heavy loads and burdens.

His Word says… “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”

He wants your stuff.  Your weakness, your cares, your every moment of every day….simply because He cares and is crazy about you!

So in looking at those verses, here is my final thought on what I know He is saying to me today…(Sweeping The Temple Version!)

My daughter, I am so crazy about you!  I see how things are spinning around you and I want you to know today that I love you and I am in the midst. Cast your cares on me today…Trust in Me and stop trying to fuss and fret and work it out in your own head…I got this!!  I know the path I have for you, humble yourself and the feeling that you have to do it all for yourself…you never have to do it alone for I am here and want to take it from you because I love you.  I see you are tired but remember this…I am at my very best in you when you are feeling your weakest.  I love you, daughter…

See…He simply does…because he simply loves.

In my weakness, He is strong.

Stop, Surrender, Submit, Strength, Success.

I’m praying for you, keep sweeping.

My Broken Year…and the God Who Heals.

Can it stop?  Please?  Make it stop, God!!  Make the hurt go away!  These and more were all my cries in the midst of the last year.  The hurt, the brokenness, the death, the sorrow….it was overwhelming and it JUST KEPT COMING.  How much can one woman take, God?  I know you say you wont give us more than we can handle, BUT I DONT WANT TO KNOW how strong I am!!!

He quietly stood by while I screamed at Him about not understanding…and then said, “I love you.”

 

 

Huh?  No answers…except for THE answer.  He is the God that heals…in the envelopment of His love.  He took me, sat me down and held me…and healed me.  He bottled my tears, he took the rawness and transparency of a woman who had faith and KNEW where her help comes from while she didn’t understand why it had to happen.  Why it all had to happen.  Why her friends and family members had to die.  Why one of the most precious souls were taken from her family.  Taken from me.  Why the personal challenges with my health?  I thought I was getting better, God.  Why can’t you just heal me….and then He did.  Not physically but emotionally and He gave me a new lens.  He gave me HIS perspective….of myself and others.  It’s changed my life…and how I do life.

No matter where I sit today…in my grief and sickness….I AM HIS MASTERPIECE.

No matter where I lack understanding….about anything….His ways are higher than mine.

No matter where or how much I feel inadequate…He is the one that defines me.

No matter how much I am challenged to love every piece of myself….He loves me as I am…His creation.

No matter how much I don’t understand the loss of a child…He says, “I understand, I gave my Son.”

And His balm of peace covers my broken heart.  He softly whispers…”Be still, and know that I am God.”

He assures me that whatever my day, week, month or year looks like…He will never leave me or forsake me.  He assures me that the Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.  He says I am the apple of His eye and no part of the concerns of my heart are too big for a God that promises to perfect that which concerns me.

And He offers the same for you…for your aching, tired and broken heart and spirit.  He hears you and has heard you….every cry, every inaudible sound of grief and every bit of your lack of understanding.  And He wants nothing more than to envelope you in His arms of love and say “Be still, and know that I am God.”

While I still don’t have the understanding of the “why”, I do have the understanding that His ways are higher…and that is enough for me.  *smile* Until the next time I don’t understand something…and we walk through this again.  He doesn’t mind the amount of times we bring our concerns and burdens to Him…just as long as we bring them and leave them with Him.

Things are settling down for us a bit…my heart is healing and my lens of the details has expanded to see and love as He does more clearly.  If that be the only benefit of all these things…its enough for me to know He has taken my broken year…and is still the God who heals.

He’s never let me down, friends…and I promise He wont let you down either.

I’m praying for you, keep sweeping.